Isaiah 52:12

Isaiah 52:12 - “I am he who comforts you...”

What does it mean that You comfort me? I know this verse was stated at a time in the history of Israel when they were under great distress from an attacking nation. They had been devastated by conquering nations and had been dragged into captivity to a foreign land. I am not in that position. I am under very little physical distress from any kind of attack. So my question is again, how do You comfort me? What does it mean that You comfort?

The word “comfort” is used often in attachment theory. And You use it often in the book of Isaiah. It is part of the 23rd Psalm, “Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me”. The Hebrew definition reads like this; “the root seems to reflect the idea of ‘breathing deeply,’ hence the physical display of one’s feelings, usually sorrow, compassion, or comfort.” To comfort then includes the element of emotional response. For You to comfort me tells me that You have an emotional response to me. That response would be a deep response. Emotions are based on external information that heightens an attentive state and that bias the motivational energy in a particular direction. All that to say, if You have a deep feeling about me, then You have a strong set of motivational factors that focus on me. You are geared toward me. I set off attentional energy in You.

But the word comfort is used as a verb. You comfort me. And as a verb, action is implied. You not only have a deep set of emotions regarding me, these emotions set You into action and movement. So what then is that action and movement? What is it that You do from the deep set of emotions that rule You?

The deepest sense of distress that I experience whether I know it or not is the distress that comes from relational un-wholeness, that is, the anxiety that I have from wanting to be accepted, loved, appreciated, effective, enjoyed. Being dismissive/avoidant about the role of people in my life insures that I have to make myself accepted, loved, appreciated, effective and enjoyed on my own. And that does not work. I have to have somebody other than myself to make sense of these. I am made to be enjoyed, accepted, appreciated. That is the way You made me.

The internal model in me, however, keeps me from other people and from You. My mental network keeps me distant from others. The framework within me sets me away from what You and others provide. And the end result is a constant state of anxiety. I may not feel it. I may not know it. It shows up as anger most of the time. I cannot be anxious about needing because I am independent. But I can be angry. That is how it shows up. Anger. The longing comes out in anger. The anxiety finally erupts in a mood of anger.

Now I see. You comfort me by bringing relational wholeness to me. Your energy moves me out of the avoidant state and into an attachment state with You and with others. You are loving, compassionate, kind, tender, engaging, attentive, focused, accepting. And You are all of that all of the time. Your motivational energy can be described as the Paternal Gleam. That describes Your attitude toward me: Paternal Gleam. Paternal gleam moves me out of avoidance and into attachment. To see You with paternal gleam means that You have the look of joy all over Your face whenever I come to Your mind or into Your presence. That is what You want me to see when I approach You. And that is all of the time. And that is very comforting.

Isaiah 50:10, to trust and to rely

Isaiah 50:10 “Let him who walks in darkness and has no light trust in the name of the LORD and rely on his God.”

In attachment terminology, I am an avoidant person. That means that attachment and relational issues are going to be avoided. I have no mental model that regards bonding with others. Even though I get along well with people and enjoy being around people, I am going to seek independence over attachment. If I have a problem, I will seek to solve the problem on my own and the solution will not require anything from anybody other than myself. Any emotions that are associated with attachment will also be avoided or shoved into a mental hole and buried there.

Two terms are mentioned in this verse that are difficult for me to grasp: trust and rely. Both of these terms are attachment related ideas. As a matter of fact, these terms define attachment. To trust and to rely mean to bond to something. The Hebrew word for trust means “the sense of well-being and security which results from having something or someone in whom to place confidence”. Implied in this definition is the desire for well-being and security. And these come about because of something outside the person. There has to be something or somebody to have confidence in. So my question is how do I develop this “confidence”? Where does this confidence come from? These questions have been easily answered by attachment theory and human development research.

Attachment patterns are developed in a child within the first 12 months of his life. If the relational experience is one of attunement, marked by joy, pleasure, attentiveness and responsiveness then the child will have imprinted in his mind that people are a good source for well-being and security. He will be secure regarding relationships and be able to have close bonds with people. If the relational experience is one of dismissiveness and avoidance, then the child will have imprinted in his mind that life is to be done alone. He will avoid relationships and emotional experiences because they are not meaningful to him. If the child experiences an inconsistent attunement, then he will have imprinted in his mind that people are inconsistent and can only be partially available. He will become anxious regarding relationships.

A secure pattern of attachment will certainly be able to trust and to rely on others for well-being. But the avoidant and the anxious patterns will have much difficulty trusting or relying. And this inability to trust or rely will apply to God as well. If I have not learned how to trust in my relational history with primary care-givers then I will not be able to trust God. If the imprinted pattern in my mind is avoidant, then I will avoid any attempt at closeness whether it is with God or with anybody.

Here is a question that every infant will ask unconsciously: “Is an attachment figure available and likely to be responsive to my needs?” The needs are not just physical but include emotional needs as well. Depending on how the primary care-givers answer that question for the infant will determine the strategy that the infant will use to get through life. If the environment is responsive and available then the infant will have a place of confidence for depending and relying on others. If the environment is unavailable and unresponsive then the infant will develop strategies to make life work without confidence in another. And that applies to God. They will be insecure and unable to trust or to rely on somebody else to care for them or comfort them during times of distress.

I happen to be dismissive about relationships. I am avoidant in my attachment pattern. And that means that I live life being confident in only myself. No wonder I have a hard time trusting God for anything as evidence by the hard time I have praying. I solve all my problems or issues on my own and the solution will always require nothing from another person. Including God.

Isaiah 49, again

Isaiah 49:15-16 “Can a woman forget her nursing child, that she should have no compassion on the son of her womb? Even these may forget, yet I will not forget you. Behold, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands; your walls are continually before me.”

These two verses graphically illustrate how You feel about me and further promote the idea of an “attachment theology”.

1. You will not forget me. To make this point, You picture the most precious and intimate attachment bond; the nursing mother and her infant. Could a mother ever forget her nursing child? The question is almost striking because the answer is so obvious. It is incomprehensible that this could ever occur. It is almost unnatural for a mother to forget her nursing child. And it is unnatural for a mother to not have a deep sense of bond with her infant. But You note that it could occur. It is possible that a nursing mother could forget or neglect her infant. Yet You will never forget me. The Hebrew word means “to forget or ignore”. In attachment terminology, You are always attentive to me. I am always present to You. I am always being considered by You. I am always on Your mind. No detail escapes Your notice. I am always being attended to by Your ever-constant caring gaze. To use our current culture wording, You do not have attention deficit disorder.
2. You have engraved me on the palms of Your hands. The Hebrew word for engraved is “cutting in or engraving in stone”. And it refers to “enacting a decree”. So what does it mean that You engrave me in the palms of Your hands? People often times write on their hands so that they will not forget something they need to do. I think that You are helping me understand that I am permanently etched into Your favor. You have carved my name on Your hands. You are saying that You are taking action to insure that You will never forget me. You are enacting a law to Yourself that You will never ignore me. You are binding Yourself to me. You are formalizing a decree that will not allow You to leave me unattended. And this decree is of Your own doing. You want me etched into Your palms. You want to attend to me. You want to be bound to me.
3. You keep my walls continually before Yourself. The Hebrew word for walls means “walls, father-in-law, mother-in-law”. And it can refer to close relatives in general. The word “before” means “to place a matter high, conspicuous before a person”. The word “continually” stresses the constancy of personal devotion. I get the feeling that the word “walls” is meant to describe the environment that I am living in now like living in a house but not necessarily the physical aspect as much as the relational aspect. Relatives seem to make me think of the relational past that I have experienced. In attachment theory, a person develops a particular attachment pattern or mental model as a direct result of the environment that he lived in. This pattern would be passed to him based on how his primary care-givers attuned to him or failed to attune to him. And unless strong measures are taken, this pattern will not change. And this environment is before You in a conspicuous place requiring much of Your attention. What I experienced in the past is a high priority to You because You know that if I am to get very close to You, I have to overcome some faulty attachment patterns that I learned in the past. You want that pattern changed so that we can bond. And then You add that term continually. You are personally devoted to attachment with me constantly. Never-ending. Always at it. And the cool thing is that I can see You changing that attachment pattern by all that You tell me. It is like the change occurs in me because of the way You bond to me. You show me how You are the perfect attachment figure.

Isaiah 49

I am trying to combine what i am learning about attachment theory with what i am learning about the fatherhood of God. At some time in the future i will try to do more to explain attachment theory. i am sort of developing what i casually refer to as "attachment theology". And i write as if i am writing to God. So you will notice that i refer to Him as You often.

Isaiah 49:8

“In a time of favor I have answered you; in a day of salvation I have helped you...”

1. In a time of favor, You answer. The word for favor means “pleasure, delight, favor”; in the special sense “to be favorably received”. It also contains the concept of “delight” or “acceptance” of an individual. Because You favor me, You answer me. That You favor me is an interesting idea. To rephrase it, You take pleasure in me. You delight in me. You are happy with me. You are overwhelmingly accepting of me. In attachment terminology, one of the key words is attunement. Attunement means pleasure and interest; joy and attentiveness. For You to delight in me and then to answer me is attunement. You attune to me. There is pleasure and there is interest. Sometimes it helps me to think about what the opposite of a word means. The opposite of pleasure would be displeasure or disgust. There is a lot out there that would make me think that You are disgusted with me. And frankly, there is plenty for You to be disgusted with. But it is obvious from this verse and many others that You are not disgusted with me. You take great pleasure in me. You enjoy me. I bring You happiness. I create in You delight. What look on Your face would I see if I could? What kind of face would show pleasure and delight and acceptance? I can imagine a smile that is a mile long; bright eyes with penetrating affection; raised eyebrows expressing engagement. That kind of face draws me toward You. Your face is the face of pleasure.
2. In a day of salvation, You help me. The Hebrew word for salvation is rich. “The root meaning in Arabic is ‘make wide’ or ‘make sufficient’; this root is in contrast to ‘narrow’, which means ‘be restricted’ or ‘cause distress’. That which is wide connotes freedom from distress and the ability to pursue one’s own objectives. To move from distress to safety requires deliverance. Generally the deliverance must come from somewhere outside the party oppressed. The one who brings deliverance is known as the ‘savior’.” I never heard this in a sermon. One of the key components in attachment theory is the distress that comes as a result of a break in attachment with the primary care-giver. As a matter of fact, the whole attachment theory was initiated by observing children experience distress and anxiety when a parent was removed from their presence for any one of a number of reasons, mostly unintended. Salvation then means the removal from the restricted environment of distress and anxiety to the unrestricted environment of peace and wholeness. Distress comes through detachment. The movement into peace comes through attachment. Salvation is You bringing about this movement. The Messiah came to bring me into an attachment bond with You. I was cleaned up for You by Him and now there is unrestricted access to You. I enter into what I refer to as “relational wholeness” with You. I can experience a deep and affectionate bond with You that will never end. I will always be able to see the face of pleasure whenever I turn Your way.

Isaiah 48

Hear are some thoughts from thinking and reading over a couple of verses in Isaiah 48. I am using the English Standard Version and when I quote the Hebrew definitions, i am using the Theological Word Book Of The Old Testament. I hope you have as much fun with God as i did over these ideas.

Isaiah 48:15-16

“I, even I, have spoken and called him; I have brought him, and he will prosper in his way.

Draw near to me, hear this: from the beginning I have not spoken in secret, from the time it came to be I have been there.”

1. You have spoken. You are not silent. There are words that You want me to hear. There is a message You want me to understand. So You speak. Any breakdown in the communication process leads to uncertainty. And You do not want me to be uncertain about Your intentions and feelings toward me. This is vital for attachment to continue. There has to be words to express You. And You are the one speaking those words. And You want it very clear. What is most important for me is to actually hear what You are saying. If I miss that message, then I miss You. That is why Your words are so important. They express You. And I could not know how You are if there are no words.
2. You have called. The Hebrew word for calling is closely associated with naming something. So for You to call is for You to name. That personalizes our connection. When Nancy and I named our children, we contemplated and discussed so that we would have the exact and perfect name for each of our children. It is heart warming to imagine that You are taking the time to give me the perfect and exact name. It is an expression of contact and intimacy. It is a spoken name. It shows that You are attentive to me. It shows that You know me. So when You are speaking, You are calling out my name and addressing me personally. To hear what You are saying means that I am going to be hearing You say my name. If I get quiet and imagine that You are saying my name, with a smile on Your face, looking deep into my eyes, my cheeks in Your hands...”Billy,...Billy,...”
3. You have brought. Now the actual Hebrew word is “to come”. The thought here is that You come to me. One of the most important words used in attachment language is “proximity seeking” behaviour. In other words, in an attachment bond between and child and parents, children seek to be as close as possible to the primary care-giver to maintain the safe and secure feeling that comes from being close. Whether You bring me close to You or You come close to me, You are actively involved in proximity seeking behaviour. You come as Savior. You came as strength. You come to comfort. And the list goes on. The point I want to feel is Your desire to be close to me and the actual work that You perform to make sure that proximity occurs between us. And again, what words would You be speaking? You are telling me that You want to be close to me and that You are going to make that happen. It is aggressive initiative from You. You move strongly toward me. I do not want to be close to a threat. You pose no threat. You are not going to shame me or create fear in me. You are going to insure that I feel safe and secure. Just like any good parent should do with their child.
4. I will prosper in my way. The Hebrew word for prosper means “to accomplish satisfactorily what is intended”. So my question for You is what is intended? What will I successively accomplish? Well, I think that You mean that I will achieve proximity with You. We will succeed at attachment to each other. The path to You will be a reality. The path will actually be traveled on together. And to succeed in proximity with You means that You have to create that path. And that path You becomes open to me through the Messiah who came to bring me into the open expanse out of the contracted prison of isolation from Your presence.
5. "Draw near to Me." Now the Hebrew word emphasizes this whole idea of proximity seeking behaviour. It literally means “being or coming into the most near and intimate proximity of the object (or subject)”. “The more essential significance of the root emerges in cases where the “drawing near” renders the subject close enough to the object to see it, to speak to it, or even to touch it.” And this is Your command. You are telling me to draw near to You. You want me to seek proximity with You. You want me close enough to You to hear You, to feel Your presence, to sense Your feelings for me. And when I am hearing You call my name, and when I am feeling Your desire to be with me, and when I am sensing Your love for me, and when I sense how special I am to You, I want more than ever to be close to You. I want to seek proximity with You.

welcome.

I am so excited for my father to get a blog! He has so much wisdom that we cannot get enough of and this seemed like the perfect way for us to get a glimpse of all that goes on in his quiet times. I hope you learn as much from him as we do! I am handing it over to him from here! ENJOY!